Geese: D-Bags of the Animal World

Today, I would like to rag on geese for awhile because they deserve it. Let me start with a story that prompted this post.

I was at work. It was a much longer day than I had anticipated. About 10 hours. Longer than my dog should be cooped up without the chance to use the bathroom. So when I finally left work I was in a hurry to get home. I pull into the apartment complex and what do I see? A goose.

Now, many people and animals have a sense of decency that they will remove themselves from the middle of the road at the sight of an oncoming car. Not these d-bags. No, this bird walked farther into the street so it could be more in the way than it was previously. Now many people will say the geese are proud and they won’t be pushed around by humans. To that I say, bullshit. They are just assholes who don’t respect the rules of the road.

They are like those bastards in school that don’t turn slightly when passing someone in the hall. You remember that guy. You are both in the center of the hallway going opposite directions. What you should do is slightly turn your torso so that you pass each other smoothly. However, there are those guys that are dicks, that walk straight, don’t turn, and knocks you off balance because they don’t give a shit. Then he grows up to become the guy in the grocery store that has his cart on one side of the aisle, and he stand next to it looking at the other side, and nobody can get by and he doesn’t care.

In conclusion, geese are assholes.

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